Shattered Truth

Failed marriages, divorce, too: By Chris Okafor

Failed marriages as divorce, too. BY CHRIS Okafor

Marriage is an act of joining a man and woman in holy matrimony as husband and wife. It often calls for fun rates, weddings, celebrations and coexistence.

People spend too much on the planning for these occasions and sometimes end up cruising around the world honeymoon. The couples had, certainly in the church and now a reverend father, pledged to be faithful and love each other till death do them part. For most people who had participated in this vote, must be accepted with respect and dignity at all times. We see marriage as a sacrament while for many, there is absolutely nothing wrong with saying "yes I "today and in the next 4 months, is all.

This school of thought believes the entire institution of marriage as "exit-entry free-free" a kind of contact. Whether your marriage celebrated well publicized and come to an end a few months after its creation.

On the other hand, divorce or dissolution of marriage is the end of civil marriage or vote before the death of one spouse. It can be contrasted with the cancellation, which is a statement that the marriage is void, though perhaps the effect recognized in such unions, such as spousal support, custody and property distribution.

The marriage problem failed and divorce around the world, particularly Europe and the United States is so enormous and inexplicable, especially when there is no basis for determining causality necessary nor sufficient. It is indeed a social problem with a hereditary attachment that many are completely unaware and never believe in the existence of the following concept that I will outline here. When one decides to end their marriage in a mere provocation and the issues to be resolved amicably, it has no moral justification to tell their children in the future that there is something wrong with divorce or having children with different fathers.

In Nigeria, for example, some ethnic groups advise their sons not marry a single parent or broken home. The irony is palpable reasons. They believed that marriage is all about tolerance and the woman being submissive to their husbands chosen at all times and therefore no amount of disagreement among couples that justify a woman who ran away from home. In most cases, men retain the exclusive right to send their wives away from home in the area of Marital Infidelity and promiscuity.

Women are usually the victim and on the contrary, due to male domination, cultural and religious affiliations, it is common for people in most African countries to return to their respective home day and announce to their women who marry for the second or third wife as the case may be, without question. They also have the exclusive right to have as many girlfriend (S) as they like, or leave and return at will.
In fact, not only taboo, but it is an abomination to the African woman way out as their European or American counterparts, get drunk and have a one night stand that often lead to pregnancy. These women may be disgraced and expelled to their children home without any compassion.

This is compared to "if you can not stand the heat get out of the kitchen" type of marriage that has been considered in some circles as a kind of slavery. The truth of the matter is that some of these women knew what it meant to them that their children are raised together and as such, choose to take the heat instead of leaving the kitchen. Respect for their husbands elected, no matter what he does or does not complete and is of fundamental importance not to embarrass her respective families, no matter how miserable, poor or rich family can be.

Recent research has shown that the evolution of marriage has taken place despite a longer life expectancy theory has made a longer and healthier life together as a couple possible. Although in the past, the death of one spouse Typical was the end of marriage, divorce is the most frequently observed.
In Switzerland, for example, the number of new residents divorced fact than the number of residents newly widowed in 1988 (OFS, 1990).

This is a relatively recent phenomenon, having less than existing half a century and even less in some countries where it was prohibited or severely restricted until very recently (mid-1970 in Portugal and Italy in 1981 in Spain and not until 1997 in Ireland). Divorce is not only a legal instrument to relieve a marriage partner, but an act that is in the center of family and social processes.
To understand the increase in the number of divorces in different countries, one must first understand the reasons that cause couples to marry. France, Italy, Sweden and Switzerland are representative of the diversity of marital and family situations in Europe.
What we sometimes see on TV the reality of America is an eye saw. A situation unacceptable in which one is married and within 3 months, the man sleeps with his mother. There is no basis for comparison between the marriage and the African peoples worldwide, because what they see as a way of life is completely banned in Africa. Once again, most people see this as something totally original.

It is difficult the average for women in Europe in general to keep their marriage when they finally realized that their husbands are cheating on them. This invariably is the height and would be used as an affront to divorce in what would be the beneficiary of her husband's wealth without resorting to super and how the separation would affect their children.
The ratio is 1 in a hundred and we've seen this working relationship for some time when a woman footballer defiant resistance to his former assistant blatant confession in order to thwart the marriage. She strongly inclined to support her husband throughout the trial period. In the U.S., during the Bill Clinton era, a newspaper unconfirmed report similar between Bill and Monica Lewinski almost ruin a marriage between then-president and his wife. Once again, the latter decides to stay with husband rather than divorce.

This is just one in a million and like a recurring decimal, hardly turns the pages of newspapers these days without reading about the divorce or the other. There are plenty of lawyers to place ads in newspapers and magazines cheap divorce rates.
Today, one of the main reasons by most celebrities can not marry is that they are willing to let what has worked all his life to the possibility of a fool in the name of the agreement divorce. It is quite obvious that people are going to marry for various reasons, while some persons, especially women more, go to marry not for profit Financial really because they needed a family.

According to Jenny Burley and Francis Regan, the Irish story of family law reform in the post-World War second is very different from the experience of other countries. One of the main reasons why the story is different is that from 1937 divorce was forbidden by the Constitution Irish. the reform of divorce law therefore requires a referendum to change the constitution. Although there were thousands of separated people in Ireland in early 1980, the proposal to introduce divorce was vociferously opposed by referendum in 1986 and 1995.

The opposition to constitutional reform was driven by campaigns against divorce, which use scare tactics, related to money, children, property and inheritance to argue that divorce would break the very fabric Irish society. The campaign also claimed that divorce would open the floodgates to marriage breakdown. The availability of this divorce in Ireland since 1997, no However, he confirmed the pessimistic predictions of the anti-divorce.
Successful marriages and has its origin and history of family circles and some people have argued that it would take divine intervention for the products of broken families to succeed where their parents have failed. This is simple. Children learn a lot of good and bad that we do at home.

What are responsible for most ignominious departure in most marriages in particular the Most women are pure greed, drink and drugs, insatiable lust and lack of tolerance, inevitably, is contributing greatly to the decline drastically in the family and social values.
The devastating effects of divorce on children and families are enormous. Research by Linamar in Dr.Todd.E Families stated:
Future effects of divorce
• Children with treating the effects of divorce not only as children, but at the age adult. The effects of divorce will affect the next generation of children.
• The child's suffering from the effects of divorce does not reach its peak at the time divorce and then level off. By contrast, the emotional effects of divorce can play and play all a child's life.
Academic effects of divorce
• Children of divorced parents drop out of school twice the rate of children from intact families and have lower rates of graduation from high school and college.
• Children from divorced homes performed more poorly in reading, spelling and mathematics, and repeated a grade more often than not facing children the effects of divorce.
Social effects of divorce
• Children of divorced parents are much more likely to become criminals by age 15, regardless of when the divorce took place, children do not deal with the effects of divorce.
• The best predictor of teen suicide is the divorce and live in a single parent.
• Comparing all family structures, drug use in children is the lowest among children do not face the consequences of divorce.
emotional effects of divorce
• The divorce has is associated with an increased incidence of depression, withdrawal from friends and family, aggressive behavior, impulsive or hyperactive, and either withdrawing from participation in the classroom or becoming disruptive.
• The adult children of divorced parents experience mental health problems significantly more often than adult children who did not witness the effects of divorce on children.
relational effects of divorce
• After the divorce, children tend to be more emotionally distant from both parents.
• As adults, children of divorce are half as likely to be near their parents as children do not deal with the effects of divorce.
• In their own marriages, Children of divorce are more likely to be unhappy, to intensify conflict and reduce communication with their spouses.
• Some studies regarding likelihood of divorce for children of divorced parents have found that the risk is more than double the risk for children who have not experienced personally effects of divorce.

This is just one of many factors that affect divorce on families and the list is endless. One thing about the people I've met in my life is that they do not realize the impact of the error that must be done in terms of making a decision that ultimately, the shape of your life until you start to hit this error. Is in the midst of significant, yet these factors we must think very carefully before considering divorce.
Chris Okafor
Galway Ireland: chrisokafor@myself.com

About the Author

Chris Obiajulu Okafor was born in Ogwashi-Uku in Delta state of Nigeria few months before the outbreak of the protracted Nigeria civil war. He had both his primary and post primary education in Ogwashi- Uku and later studied Mass Communication in the University Of Lagos.He came to Ireland in 2002 where he is presently living with his wife and 3 children. Chris is a journalist and a creative writer that has participated in many comtemporary issues both here and in Nigeria.

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